The Bro-Magnet by Lauren Baratz-Logsted
My rating: 5 of 5 stars
This has got to be one of the BEST "GUY" stories out there! Seriously!
If you've ever wanted to get inside of a guy's head while growing up, meeting someone, messing up that relationship, meeting someone else, falling in love - This book is totally for you!
I LOVE getting into a guys head - How the heck does Lauren Bartatz-Logsted do it?? WOW!
The book starts off with Johnny Smith telling his story -
"Right from the start I've been a disappointment to women"
When he was born, his mom held him for a few mins. She thought he'd be a girl, then she died -
"If you'd been a girl," Aunt Alfresca says, taking me from my dead mother's arms..." This never would have happened."
I know all this, not because I was born with some kind of precocious baby-genius capability to instantly understand language, but rather because Aunt Alfresca has spent the last thirty-three years reminding me, at fairly regular intervals."
"As I said right from the start, I've been a disappointment to woment.
Then we hear a few cute little stories of him being in grade school. Going outside to play with the guys in the neighborhood - the guys always liked him. He was a big kid - not fat, but always stronger, more energetic and ready to play sports type bigger.
But there were only 5 guys in the neighborhood, so he went next door to ask Alice to be their 6th - but Alice has issues with Johnny "Nice way to ask, Smith... We kinda need one more."
Even when he tries to be nice, he can't seem to get it right.
Sometime in Middle School, Johnny see's Alice in line at lunch. Alice Knox has the nicest... breasts of any girl in their class, and out of nowhere he reaches out to place a finger under her bra strap that's peeking out from beneath her pink tank and snaps it.. which is almost immediately followed by ... Slap
So spreading the word in Middle school, the guys cheer for Johnny being brave enough to snap Alice's bra, and the girls turn their heads at him for being "the strapper"
Senior prom - Johnny is going to prom with 7 other guys. It's not like he didn't want to take a girl to prom, actually ONE girl in particular, There was only ever one girl in that school he'd buy a corsage for. But he couldn't work up enough courage to ask her to the prom, so he decided to go stag. When word got out that he was going stag, and 7 of his friends decided to go stag with him, pretty much ever dateless girl in the school decided they'd hate him for taking 7 guys off the prom market.
(I think I'm telling too much of the story, and we're not even a full chapter into it yet!)
Anyways - SO more goes wrong at prom and he starts to wonder why guys are always telling him he's such a great guy, and yet, he can't get a girls attention..
After Johnny's dad got sick, he pretty much took over his dad's house painting company.
He usually brought along his BFF Sam (the Lesbian) to help him out. Everywhere he went, the man of the house seemed to want to become friends with Johnny, but the women were always the first to leave the house.
When he started painting Steve Millar's Dining room (for the 4th time) Steve started getting chatty with Johnny. Next thing he knew he was inviting Johnny to the Yankee’s game... $800 seats!
Now one thing we learn about Johnny was his dad, Big John raised him alone, Sure he had his Aunt Alfresca to tell him when he was screwing up everyone's lives, But Johnny did learn to become a big loyal sports fan.
So he declines the tickets (even the $800 seats behind home plate).
But eventually he caves in and decides he'll never get another chance like this. So even though they're Yankee tickets, he goes to the game with Steve. Being totally out of place, Steve and his Lawyer buddies all in suits, and Johnny in his typical Jeans and t-shirt (leaving his Met's cap at home) they hang out. Of course everyone seems to take a likening to Johnny right away.. that is except the stuffy looking women sitting on the other side of him. He tries to make polite conversation, but of course she politely declines.
He thinks she's really pretty, and can't stop thinking about her.. When Steve (whom somehow invited himself to their Friday night poker game) gave Johnny Helen's phone number because she's looking for someone to paint her house.... Johnny gets nervous..
Ok I will stop there :) I really LOVED this story! The POV from Johnny was awesome! I really felt like he was telling me the story from his POV - not like he was narriating a story, but it was happening to him with his own words.
He struggled with his feelings, he had a Lesbian as a BFF who screwed up her own relationships - so together the two of them tried to figure out what a women really wants -
HILARIOUS! I laughed so much while reading this story - it really was great!
Recommending it to everyone who enjoys a really good story - the romance was very light, but perfect for HIS Pov - there are no details or touchy feelings, just as it is - I would say this is great PG - but in an Adult Situation:)
OMG... Poor Johnny! I wish I could get into my husband's head sometimes! lol! In fact, I wonder where we would be today I never asked him out and made the first move!
ReplyDelete